For the ladies...

WORLD BEARD AND MOUSTACHE CHAMPIONSHIPS!

This is probably the greatest thing that I have ever seen. Team USA even has a blog. If you think that it doesn’t get much better than that, well, then you just have to check out the WBMC Store. The beer mugs are a steal at $9.

After perusing the website, I found out that I have a “natural” beard. “Natural” is, of course, a technical term.

To qualify as natural, the beard must flow downward and the moustache must be fully integrated. I need not tell you that integration is essential. Of course, “no artificial styling aids” are permitted.